Inspired by a question Swati (@mayas_amma) asked on her stories. I think at some point as you grow up, whether you're a parent or not, whether you want to or not, you start seeing parts of your parents in you. Or, you do all you can to ensure that you don't. My parents were conscious… Continue reading Do gentle parents raise gentle parents?
Growing up, I was convinced I’d write the next Great Indian Novel. Every teacher I’ve ever met told me that I would. Friends whom I narrated stories to suggested it. Even strangers who read things I wrote in passing chimed in! As a cocky teenager, I would sneer at popular novels, convinced I could best… Continue reading The Weight of Being ‘Good’
As parents, we can be aware of our own implicit biases and try to ensure our children grow up with a more open approach to the things around them. For that to happen though, we have to truly let go of our biases. Telling my daughter she can't have things which are pink or girly is as counterproductive as ONLY giving her those things in the first place. I believe as a parent, it's my job to expose G to everything possible - the girlish, the boyish, the neutral - and let her pick whatever she wants. Only then can she truly make an unbiased choice.
Anyway, these labels 'boyish', 'for girls,' and so on, are human constructs. Toys, clothes, and colours are not designed gendered. It's our biases that make them so. All things are, in theory, for everyone.
People often remark on what an amazing child Gulabo is. I respond saying she has always been chilled out, or easy. They ask if she sleeps 'through the night,' and I respond that she's doing really well; she sleeps all that she can be expected to. I'm asked if she throws tantrums, and I say:… Continue reading On Raising an Easy Child